Flintoff... One Hit Too Many ?

You are better than this Freddie..

I've never been a big fan of boxing. I find the hype it produces akin to the 'sports entertainment' dished up by the likes of the WWF and other such three letter organisations that appear all over satellite TV.

Flintoff's opponent, Richard Dawson from the USA, has had two previous bouts and won both. One against another debutant and the other against an opponent that had lost all 4 of his professional fights. So he has no great pedigree. But at the end of the day he is a boxer.
 No matter how much training or how much effort he has put into it, Flintoff is not a boxer. He has been given a licence with no amateur experience to speak of, to get in the ring with a heavyweight boxer. The people that issue these licences see only pound notes. As seen recently with the Dereck Chisora v. David Haye farce.
Boxing has gone down the same track as these 'entertainment' fight makers.
It has no credibility. A plethora of organisations with similar acronyms just serve to confuse. I for one could not name one, of probably half a dozen, current heavyweight champions. 20 - 30 years ago the whole world knew who the 'Champion' was.
As much as we all love Freddie,  I can't help feeling that this latest venture is ill advised. 
Freddie has the heart of a lion but the brains of a Kamikaze volunteer. 

So why is he doing it I hear you cry. Is it to keep his profile in the spotlight. Charity? Advertising? Money? Prestige? Well probably all of those reasons. But he is certainly not doing it for the best reason of all. His health. The boxing world is littered with brain dead middle aged men talking of their former glories without really knowing what day it is. Taking blows to the head from a trained heavyweight is not the advice I would offer to a 34 year old family man.

Back to the fight. What can be achieved? Let's consider the outcomes:

Freddie Wins.  Reaction will be .. A star is born, next heavyweight champion, who's he fighting next.

Freddie Loses. Oh well he gave it a go. Brave Freddie. It wasn't to be. Hang up gloves before you get hurt.

Whatever the outcome.. Sport loses, Boxing loses and Freddie loses.

I  cannot see Freddie surviving the first real punch that Dawson lands. All I hope is that his health survives.

Dig In Freddie, good luck. You will need it.

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1st December 2012

Post Fight Verdict.

Freddie was brave and worked hard. But as I say, he is not a boxer. Style, technique and experience cannot be gained in 6 months of intensive training. At almost 35 years of age I am afraid you have missed this particular bus Freddie. 


It is good that Freddie survived unscathed but that is all that was good about this 'fight'. 
Dawson was clearly under instructions not to throw any real punches. He is a professional bunny, a sacrifice to the next Flintoff outing that will be bigger, better, and more lucrative than this one. All going according to the script so far.

Only one winner last night and that was the art of hype. And Barry McGuigan's wallet.

Sports entertainment, maybe.

Sport, definitely not.

They Don't Like It Up 'Em

How to come home with four draws...

1.  Be patient at all times. 

As a batsman you must be prepared to digin and bat all day.

2.  Eliminate all shots.

Shots cost wickets and must be eliminated. Forget runs. Wicket preservation is the essence of the game.
No team in history has lost a Test Match while two men remained unbeaten at the crease.

3.  After every LBW decision. Do a DRS signal. 

This will annoy the Indians immensely. When annoyed mistakes occur.

4. Bat Pietersen at Number 11.

The Indian crowd love KP and will be looking forward to seeing him sloggin'. Keeping the crowd restless will rub off onto the team and mistakes will follow. The Indian crowd love sloggers, so they must be denied them at all cost.

5. Don't Declare.

If possible bat well into day 4. The object of the game is to ensure you do not lose.

6. Set defensive fields.

Frustrate the batsmen. These players are used to the bish, bash, bosh of T20. Long innings with hard to get runs will lead to risks and mistakes, wickets will tumble.

We must find out what they don't like and give them plenty of it. In the words of the late, great Corporal Jack Jones: ''They don't like it up 'em''

The art of drawing a match has been waning over the last decade. Defence, defence, defence is the key.

The Indians are under pressure to win. Being negative will frustrate them into submission. Bowlers will die of boredom, fielders will be redundant. We must bore the Indians to a series draw.

Follow the plan and come home undefeated.

It's not rocket surgery.

#digin and #plodon

The Legend of Fred

The World Famous Pudsey Plodders

Back Row:  Dilbert Pickles, Bill Bored, Francis Maudling, Steve Dearth, Jack Luster, Jimmy Bromide.
Front Row: Willie Stroker, Derek Dullard, Fred Boycott (Capt.), Bob Barrymore, Colin Bland.

The all conquering Pudsey Plodders were together for a mere two seasons - 1958 and 1959.  They never toured, they never won a game, they never lost a game, yet they are famous the world over.
Formed mainly from the drop outs of Pudsey High School, Yorkshire, the lads got together in the spring of 1958 for a cricket knockabout in Pudsey Park. It was here that the lads discovered their special talents. That first knockabout lasted three days, day and night. (some of the lads had to stop to get back down t'mine). During which time, no batsmen were dismissed, and no runs were scored. Fred Boycott batted for three days and the rest of the team took turns to partner him at the wicket. Many of Fred's partners were forced to retire hurt with blisters or splinters. The bats being used were made from rough sawn timber that had no grips and often caused the batsman's hands to bleed. Fred persevered through out the pain.

The lads decided to form a team, and the Pudsey Plodders, were born. They managed to get into the Bratford and District Colts League following the late withdrawal of the Laisterdyke Lethargic's team due to a bout of indifference that ravaged the team that year.

In them days matches were played over the two days of the often grey weekend. One innings matches unlimited overs, no fielding restrictions, proper cricket to hone the players skills. Matches started at 6.00am on the Saturday with a cut off time of 9.30pm on both Saturday and Sunday. No breakfast, lunch or tea breaks were taken. The games often consisted of 600 overs in total.

From the first hour of the first game it became clear that the Pudsey Plodders had something special.

Day 1.

Playing Listlesshills Tigers from Bratford, Pudsey won the toss, following a superb call of heads from the self appointed captain, Fred Boycott.

Fred chose to bat. His opening partner that day was Colin Bland. During the first hour 22 overs were bowled. Not a run was scored from the bat.  Fred and Colin left anything that was not on the wicket, the ball sometimes skimming as close as a sixteenth of an inch from the off stump. The pair of them had an immediate awareness of the 'corridor of certainty'.  Any ball on the wicket was met with a firm forward defensive block sending the ball immediately to earth never more than a foot in front of them. During that first hour the ball made contact with the bat only seven times. It was enthralling stuff.
So it continued throughout day 1. Fred screaming at Colin at regular intervals throughout the day whenever Colin dared to venture out of his crease when a loose shot from him beat the infield. 'Get back lad' was Fred's regular cry.

Close of Play Day 1.

39 - 0 off  320 overs.   12 nb, 27 wides.

Day 2.

Colin failed to show. It was reported he had attended Pudsey General hospital at 9.45pm the previous evening and had been admitted with symptoms of severe tediumosmosis. A condition related to exposure to prolonged periods of boredom..
Fred arrived early at the ground as fresh as a daisy. Making use of the on site nets for the two hours prior to the match.
Following the drawing of lots in the Pudsey changing room Dilbert Pickles was selected to continue the innings with Fred.
Fred gave Dilbert his instructions. ''Block or leave''. This is all he needed to know.
Dilbert faced his first ball and with his eyes closed took an almighty swing at the ball, getting a thick edge to third man. Fred shouted ''Go Go''.  Fred remained in his crease. Dilbert was run out by 20 yards.
Dilbert protested with Fred that he had shouted GO,  ''Nay lad, ''No No'', I shouted you cloth eared clot''. It became apparent from the incident that Fred was not prepared to share the wicket with sloggers.
Next man in was Jimmy Bromide. He followed Fred's instructions to the letter.
The match continued until 9.30pm. at which point the Plodders had progressed to 53 - 0 with all the runs coming from extras.

The Listlesshills captain approached Fred and asked why he had not gone for runs to make a game of it.
''Don't be daft lad, we've not come here to watch you lot bat, soft arse''. Fred went straight to the nets for a further two hours practice.

The Legend of Fred was born.